Musings...

Peace is not what's around us. It's what's inside us.
The past few months have been difficult for me. I've struggled a lot with anxiety, and my family has been through a lot too. I guess that's why I've been blogging less. I feel vulnerable and it's harder to be open. I feel like I'm still trying to crawl out of it, but I know I need to.
It's because what happened today has happened. And what will happen tomorrow, we just don't know. We all WILL go through good and bad in our lives, at some point. We'll smile and laugh, and we'll experience loss and cry. But we have to live in the present. Only recently I've realized how much people don't.
A lot of them are actually Christians. Faith can be a wonderful thing, our foundation and hope. But there's something bad about taking the Bible literally to a point that it turns into a bunch of conspiracy theories. For the first time, I think I actually understand prejudice. Of course, it's completely wrong! But I can see how it happens- out of fear. People are afraid of the implications of things they don't understand. They're afraid of people who are different to them. For example, people believing all Muslims are bad, because of terrorists. Or people being against certain governments just because of something they 'heard.' It's not so good! The point of religion at some point, was to give us understanding of why we're here and where we're going...but people turned it into a license to judge everyone, and try to scare us into agreeing with them! (Note to Jehovah's witness people ringing my doorbell!!!)
I don't think Jesus wanted us to live in fear. Maybe that's what grace is all about. If we were all capable of obeying God's rules and doing the right thing all the time, we wouldn't have needed Jesus. We don't have all the answers, but it's ok, because God does, and he's loving enough that he gave us everything we have.
Maybe this is the first time in my life I've really understood that. It makes it hard to regret the past few months, even though they're been horrible!

"For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, that no one should boast." - Ephesians 2: 8-9